Textbook Abuse in Wide Sargasso Sea

One thing that I come back to every time that we talk about Antoinette and Rochester’s relationship is how unhealthy the dynamic seems. I think we mostly agreed that as the book and their relationship develops, it turns darker, as Rochester becomes more jealous and more possessive. However, before we get into Rochester’s controlling tendencies I want to look back and reflect at the beginning.

We generally had an optimistic view of Rochester in the beginning, which was the point. He was mostly friendly and more willing to learn about the island and it’s culture than Mr. Mason ever was. It’s also at this point where we see their relationship growing as they get to know each other and figure out what the other expects. Around this time is when we start to see Rochester talking about making her into an English girl. As time goes on we see his efforts in trying to make sure that she fits the ideals he has for her (PSA you should never have to change who you are for your partner).

This is also when Antoinette is exposed to someone who shows care for her for one of the first times in her life. In doing this, Rochester, unknowingly or not, made Antoinette dependent upon him for the affection she craves. We can see this dependence in the middle of part 2 when she goes to Christophine, talking about how cold Rochester suddenly was to her. At this point Rochester has control over Antoinette because he has something he can hold over her, his affection. Now I’m not necessarily saying that this was his motivation, but this is a characteristic of an unhealthy relationship.

Later on, he cheats on Antoinette with Amelie, fully aware that Antoinette is in the next room over and can hear them. His motivation is not made very clear to us, though I would argue that it’s not an unreasonable assumption to make that he did it out of spite or to make Antoinette feel worse. A way of showing her that he is giving the attention she wants and craves to another woman. However, he does provide a justification that he was provoked by Antoinette putting the potion in his drink. To be clear, I am in no way justifying or defending Antoinette’s actions in that situation, but I will say that his refusal to own up to his own mistakes and blaming them on Antoinette, claiming that she essentially drove him to cheat on her is another common sign of an abusive relationship. It is also a way that he tries to manipulate her to be the way he wants her to be.

Then of course, when Christophine tries to stand up for Antoinette and get her out of the situation, he becomes defensive. We’ve had quite a bit of discussion in class about Rochester’s sudden jealousy and possessiveness. However, I would argue that this is an advancement of Rochester’s abusive characteristics. He clearly has no interest in Antoinette at this point, even hates her. Yet he also is strongly opposed to letting her go or even the idea of anyone else getting to “have” her. After this, he takes her to England and locks her up in his attack. While that alone would be enough to justify abuse and even neglect, he is not only shutting her away inside his house to keep her for himself. He is also taking her away from all of the people she knows (like Christophine) and effectively preventing her from seeing anyone else in her life. This is ultimately the defining factor because in this move, Rochester and his relationship with Antoinette essentially lead to her mental health issues and eventually her death.

For the list of abusive characteristics I used as reference: https://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/abuse-defined/